And Run!

So first I had such a wonderful night last night! I went and babysat with my friend/roomie Amanda! She has an aunt that lives down in Provo and so she invited me to go down with her! It was the BEST! We watched her 3 little nephew 8, 5, 3 they were adorable! It was so much fun! I hope I dont jinx myself when I say I hope I have all boys when I start to have kids! The 5 year old and I became friends right away! I said, Hey Jackson are you my buddy?! he was like nooooooo giggling and then we went down stairs and he came and sat on my lap turned around and then said Jessica I am just kidding... we are buddies! :) so adorable and then everyone was laying down watching a movie and so he comes over and lays down next to me and starts to cuddle me and he said Jessica...we are BEST FRIENDS!!! This kid was adorable he melted my heart!  The cutest line of all is when he had to get up and do something he starts to leave and then comes back, grabs my hand and says Jessica I have to leave, but dont worry we are still best friends! :) It was such a fun night!

This is the boys and Amanda with our ginger bread cake that we all decorated! It was covered in icing lol

So for the title of this post I chose the song title And Run! Such a good song! I heard it for the first time today and it fit perfectly with my thoughts the last few days. Me and Amanda were even talking about the very subject on the way home last night! Its the concept that a lot of people have of needing a significant other in their life to be happy and to be productive and accomplish things. It kind of goes along with one of my favorite quotes and life mottos that "Far too many people are looking for the right person instead of being the right person." The song is amazing! You should listen to it! Anyways, I have noticed that most girls sit around waiting for a man to come and save them. Like suddenly having someone in their life is going to make everything better. While having someone there is nice it is important not to just sit there waiting. Develop yourself and have fun! 

So often the religious culture I grew up in if you are 21 and not married girls start to feel abnormal or strange and they are left not knowing what to do with themselves. Now me on the other hand I am probably a little too opposite of this. I have too much planned. A life where there isnt space for someone to come and "save me" I have everything planned out. I graduate right after I turn 21 and then I want to go on a mission for my church and then come back, get a job at a PR firm and then go to cosmetology school! Go to a different country to help less fortunate people and teach little children english! What I have been trying to figure out for me and my life is a way to balance these two extremes! To find a place for someone to come in to my life. I tend to push men away who try  to come in to my life! But I am working on it!

The most important thing that I have left out is my ultimate dream to become a mother and while all my goals are good and righteous desires to achieve my ultimate goal I need to learn how to open myself up to men. So that is my biggest goal for 2011 is to provide room in my life for "men" not saying that I hope I get married anytime...NO NO NO NO NO lol I just need to make some changes so that I am ready when God needs me to be! Much love to everyone! I hope you have a wonderful week! :)

Here is that song :)